When you are pro-war even the abortion doctors call you "baby-killer."

2004-06-09

This blog si teh suck!

I got nothing today.

Go play a video game, or watch music videos. Leave me alone...


Okay that was mean. To fill the void in your life that is so huge you are reading my blog to feel better about yourself, try these out sometime:

Try to fit the words "smarmy" or "ombudsman" into casual conversation.

Count the number of scratches on your iPod.

See how long you can hold your breath, and then see if you can beat that time, repeatedly.

Try to not think about polar bears.

Watch the Spanish-language TV shows and see how long it takes for you to figure out what the fuck the show is about. When you do, switch to another Spanish-language channel and start all over. See if you can beat your time from the previous show.

Order an Adult Pay-Per-View that has the absolute worst title you can find, watch it, and call the cable company and complain that it was not graphic/explicit enough and you want a refund. Or alternately just call the cable company and demand that they put gay porn on Pay-Per-View, really nasty gay porn. With at least 3 guys in each scene.

Go outside and look for other human beings, try talking to one of em. Especially the female ones, they are soft to the touch, which you would already know if you stepped outside once in a while instead of sitting on your ass looking at the Internet/TV all day/night.